queerical:

apersnicketylemon:

artifuls:

apersnicketylemon:

mccoppinscrapyard:

i honestly hate this post ( that i cropped so y’all don’t have to read the whole thing ) like……….. asexuality isn’t 18+ and just…….. let people discover who they are and try on labels if they want, if they decide they’re not really ace who are you to judge???? let kids figure themselves out without dictating their identity for them

When I was 13 I thought I was bi. When my friend was 14, she thought she was bi. My cousin, at 12 years old, id’d as bi. Turns out none of us are. There’s no problem here. I’m just pointing out that it’s really fucking ridiculous to blame an entire community because you were wrong about your identity during an age when NEARLY ALL of us were wrong. Because we were still exploring ourselves and finding our labels.

Like, you could literally do that to EVERY COMMUNITY, but you zero in on aspecs because y’all are too foolish to realize that telling kids about these id’s or not won’t change anything. The same percentage of people will still be initially wrong about their identities as they are now, because that’s how exploration and breaking free of heteronormativity and cisnormativity WORKS.

Anyways this is the full post and it’s literally just saying that children shouldn’t be worrying about sexual attraction and that if they don’t experience it they don’t automatically have to ID as ace, AND ALSO SAYS it’s not the same thing as being gay/bi/trans because those don’t necessarily have to do with sexual attraction but go off

Lmao, the whole post is actually worse than the section cropped.

1) It still blames the entire aspec community for their own mis-identification at 13, their friends misidentification at 14, and their cousins identity at 12.
2) It ignores that most children experience their first sexual attraction (not romantic, SEXUAL attraction) at about 10-12 (With some later bloomers and some earlier bloomers). In my own personal experience, by grade 5 (10-11) nearly every person in my class was already talking about it. By grade 6 (11-12) People were already demanding to know who was a virgin and who wasn’t.
3)Requires a false definition of asexuality. They say those orientations have nothing to do with SEX. Not SEXUAL ATTRACTION. Asexuality ALSO doesn’t imply anything about sex. Because it’s about who you are attracted to (No one), not about who you are or are not having sex with.

Them saying ‘asexuality is literally directly about sex’ is a false definition, which is something people have already explained AT LENGTH. It is HARMFUL to continue using a false definition to tell people they can’t explore their identities. It is a LOT more harmful than a kid misidentifying themselves as ace when they’re 14. But go off, I guess.

this whole “pre-teens shouldn’t be thinking about sex so it’s wrong to teach them about asexuality” is.. infuriatingly hilarious to me. do these folks even fucking remember what it was like to be a pre-teen? cuz let me tell you, if i knew about asexuality when i was 12 i absolutely would have identified with that SPECIFICALLY because i wasn’t feeling the same sexual feelings as my peers

i started my period when i was 11 (a proper “woman” and all that you know). my peers were talking about dating, about porn, learning where babies came from. kids were experimenting with masturbation. i was reading smut (like so many ppl on this site admit to doing) becuz sex was a fascinating thing to me even if i didn’t have an interest in doing it. my CHURCH was telling me to wait to have SEX until marriage (plus that whole “if you let some rando lick your cupcake then you won’t be able to share it with your SoulMate” bs)

you can say “pre-teens shouldn’t be thinking about sex” all you want, but the fact is that pre-teens ARE going to be thinking about sex and THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO FUCKING STOP THEM

and that is NOT the fault of asexual people, that’s just a natural evolution of kids going through puberty and entering a more mature world and experimenting with relationships. and if some pre-teen isn’t feeling those sexual feelings that their peers are, then they deserve to know they aren’t strange or broken or abnormal, that there are other people like them. and maybe that’ll change and maybe it won’t (it sure didn’t for me) but it’s not WRONG for them to identify with asexuality; no more wrong than it would be for them to identify as gay or bi or lesbian or pan becuz it isn’t just about sex it’s about SEXUAL ATTRACTION

honestly it’s like y’all internalized all that bullshit homophobic hypersexualization of gay/queerness and have decided to redirect it at asexuals as some sort of twisted revenge and it’s hypocritical as FUCK

When I was 14, I heard the word asexual for the first time. I had lots of experiences to think it might apply to me… After all, kids around that age actually talk about sexual attraction a lot. I had peers grilling me about who I found hot and thinking I was a liar or not trusting them fully when I couldn’t come up with answers for them, or felt really neutral in the face of it. I ended up lying to please people about people I thought were attractive. These experiences can certainly apply to non-ace kids as well, there’s a lot of nuance, but I think… it would’ve been okay for someone to ID with the label at that age just for a bit anyway, even if just to figure themselves out.

Anyway at that age, I thought to myself: I’m young, it can’t possibly apply to me, I don’t have the right to describe myself like that. I was also scared calling myself asexual would be ‘dehumanizing’ myself. This was back when there wasn’t as much loaded negativity around the term! I didn’t attach fully to the term until I was 19-ish and back then it was not a happy realization.