Tag: text

el0himapologist:

landofheatandclockwork:

racingbarakarts:

myblogisnotinteresting:

racingbarakarts:

I used to have geese so here’s a tip for everyone:

If a goose is attacking you, don’t run. No matter what, stand your ground. They can fly but when they’re mad, they don’t usually try to fly. Hold your hands in front of you, ready to grasp. When the goose gets close, grab it by the neck bit closest to the head and squeeze. Not tight enough to choke the goose, but tight enough so they can’t break free. You can hold them until they calm down or just do the next step right away. The next step is literally just to chuck them as far as possible and run for your life. It makes the goose know you’re in charge and you have a better chance of getting away. Trust me I’ve done this so many times that I’ve lost count

I can’t tell if this is a shitpost or actual advice. But I do know geese are the fucking worst.

Actual advice! Just yeet a goose

AGGRESSIVE REMINDER THAT DUMB GEESE HOLD NO POWER OVER US

This is really solid, good advice until the “toss” bit.  If that’s a heavy breed of domestic goose, it’s going to get hurt if you toss it.  The legs of geese can be very fragile.  Once you damage a leg, it’s one foot in the grave, so to speak.  I hate to imagine my geese attacking people (which is why I wouldn’t let anybody near them that didn’t know how to handle them), but I also hate the idea of having to euthanize an otherwise healthy goose because somebody didn’t know how to handle it right.

If it’s a domestic goose, and you can pick it up, the best thing to do is pick it up and make sure you have control of the neck, body, and wings.  Walk around with him a bit.  He’ll know attacking you gets him nothing he wants.

OP is right in that you should never run from a goose.  They are very much bullies, and running from them reinforces bad behavior.